my journey into kink

Yes, i said panties.  First the word itself.  Unaided brand awareness, consumer acceptance, and attitude & usage scores are all off the charts when we discuss panties.

Men’s underwear.  Boxers.  Boxer briefs.  This is America so that’s the beginning and end of the discussion and let’s face it…literally nothing sexy about either.  Zzzzzzzzzzzzz.

So Mistress wants me to wear panties 3 times a week when i work out.  LOL

Clearly some research was in order.  Are there such things as workout panties?  i can’t say that i recall seeing panty lines on any women at the gym.  Hmm…no panty lines…OK, now we’re on to something…

i head to the Victoria’s Secret website.  Frankly, not something a man in chastity should be doing but nonetheless here i am.  So the logical first question, “what is the appropriate type of panties to wear when working out?”  Wait a minute, i’ve never even heard of some of this stuff.  And when they say invisible under clothes…i mean does that include workout clothes or are we only talking about jeans, etc here?

Baffling and complex.  So many choices.  my underwear drawer requires little more than the ability to use your thumb and index finger.  Pretty much anything you pull out is gonna work with whatever i happen to be wearing.  Evidently, not so for Women.  Could it get more confusing?

Boyshorts?  What precisely about these panties have anything to do with boys? Seriously now.  They don’t look like anything i wore as a boy.  Hiphugger?  Cheekies?  The fuck?  i understand thong and i’ve heard of a G-string but V-string?  i am so in over my head.  Feeling subconscious, i decide to focus on the “no lines and seamless” group assuming that’s the best approach.  But this group has like everything in it.  And a heck of a lot of these don’t look like “no lines” at all.  So then i’m thinking, “what the hell is the difference between no lines and seamless?”

Up pops a new term now…hipster.  Kinda like somewhere between a bikini and a boyshort.  Oh, baby Jesus save me…

Stepping back into my own body, i realize that this, like anything, requires me to evaluate my purchasing triggers.  i decide that i want to please Mistress but also be able to avoid panty lines.  LOL – suddenly now i’m worried about panty lines.  Mistress mentioned at our first dinner together that she preferred bikini panties.  Now i’m ready, no lines bikini panties…those are the ones for me.

So it seems now that my target is the “no show bikini panties”.  There are 12 current colors and 4 sizes.  i assume out of the gate that I’m a XL size so that limits my color choices to 10…recognizing that “happy pink” and “daring red” are probably 2 colors that Mistress would have preferred for me.

Thankfully, i have a very narrow scope to this assignment so i can figure out my needs.  i seriously have to wonder how a Woman goes through this process.  Under what circumstances would a Woman choose a “cheeky panty”?  Are there certain features and benefits with a cheeky panty that you don’t get from a thong or a bikini panty?

What’s the difference between a “lacie”, a “thong”, a “g-string”, and a “v-string”?  i mean that’s just amazing…

Given that i had a very short window of time to buy these panties, my website research was only to make the in-store visit somewhat less painful.  i write down the name of the ones i need and i head out to the mall.

Sunday afternoon and I’m headed to Victoria’s Secret to buy 3 pair of panties.  Extra-large panties.  The magnitude of how much this going to suck hit me around the time I walked around the corner and into the store.  It was packed.  Literally had to be 100 or more people in the store.  i am panicked and feeling like some kind of pervert and i zero in on the first woman i can identify as an employee.

Passing out would probably be more merciful but instead i say, “um, hello, um…i, um, was sent here and um, i need to buy these.”  And with that i hand her a piece of paper with the name.  i can’t even look at Her.  i just stand there like a moron looking straight down at my feet.  She is incredibly sweet and without hesitating says, “oh, no problem sir, they are right over here.”  I follow her and just do my best not to make eye contact with anyone.  As she casually opens the drawers of the display table to find the panties i wrote down, I’m seriously just flipping out.

She hands them to me and i force myself to make eye contact with Her long enough to say “thank you” and i turn away to find the register.  Because this can’t possibly end mercifully, when i get to the back of the store and find the registers, there are two lines of at least 10 people per line.  Bad but at least i’m in the back of the line.  As i wait my turn, i realize it is progressively worse to have more and more people (all Women) standing behind me.  This isn’t a gift, i’m not buying these for someone else.

Honestly, i felt like i was melting and just prayed for the line to move so i could put myself out of my misery.  It had to take 15 minutes or more…felt like an hour.  In the end, I had the pleasure of walking through the entire damned mall with the unmistakable pink striped Victoria’s Secret bag.

That was awful.  To tell you the truth, the only thing that got me through it was thinking about pleasing Mistress.  She wanted me to endure it and i didn’t want to disappoint Her.  Maybe that’s the point of public humiliation assignments, right?  She can take pleasure in knowing what i will endure for Her.  And it also serves as a means of further humbling me, reminding me of my place.  Sure, i joked in the early part of this post but rest assured that was quite possibly the most humiliating moment in my life.